Lets Prioritize!

Okay, lets all face it, American priorities are seriously out of whack. We see it everywhere we look and many times we most clearly see it in our families and relationships. Our country is known for its busy, overdriven, workaholic, convenience ways and it has drastically impacted the face of the family. Moms and Dads are working 60, 70, 80+ hours a week, obesity is an epidemic, homes are disorganized, children are out of control, marriages are skating on thin ice, faith is being buried and homes are crumbling around us. YES, our priorities are sorely out of alignment.

For those of you who know me I have a personal relationship with Jesus Christ and shape my life around His principles. My intention writing this blog was not to have it be a "spiritual blog," but rather a "relational blog." No matter where you are or what you believe, you can get something from this. I must confess, however, that this blog is going to get spiritual because my life is NOTHING without the sacrifice of the Cross and the grace extended me from Jesus Christ. When I decided to talk about priorities, I knew that the first priority is a growing relationship with Christ. If you do not have that relationship, I encourage you wholeheartedly to consider a personal relationship with Him. Without Him I am nothing and all that I have comes from Him. The storms and stresses of this life are only made manageable because of His presence in my life.

Every day we prioritize. Whether or not you have an actual list of "to dos" that are carefully numbered and labeled matters not, trust me you prioritize your life. You decide to exercise over sleep, shower over eat, work over play, cook over clean, read to kids over work calls, sleep over sex and all other life decisions. Yes, you prioritize tasks and activities every day. What I want to address is a more general life list. Where does work, kids, husband, God, friends, yourself and community fit on the list of your life? Have you ever thought about it? Do you know that where you put each one of these will dramatically affect your life, your family, your happiness? Well then, lets list.

Your number one priority: A Relationship with God.
You were created out of the image of a perfect God, a loving God, a RELATIONAL God. He intended for you to live and work and grow in relationship with Him and all other relational creatures. Sadly we chose sin and in that choice, we selfishly told God that we could do better. Let me assure you, if our world is any indication we most certainly CANNOT. Without His presence working to transform our selfish ways we are getting lost in a sea of messed up people, broken marriages, misguided children and crumbling families. "The wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life in Jesus Christ our Lord"(Romans 3:23). Know that "God so loved the world that He sent his only Son to die for you. So that whoever believes in Him and calls Him Savior will not perish, but will have eternal life" (John 3:16). Understand that Jesus is "The Way, the Truth and the Life, you don't get anywhere without HIM (John 14:6). Please understand that He must be first for all other facets of your life to be healthy and well prioritized.

Number Two: Your Spouse.
Yes, this one comes before your children! And for those of you who do not have children, it comes before work and extended family and friends....... Your spouse should be the next important priority after your relationship with God. So often we allow our spouses to take the back burner to our lives. This, however, is the reason why we as husbands and wives are "falling out of love" and having "irreconcilable differences." Your spouse needs to feel important in your life and if your children are getting in the way, its time to re-prioritize. You may think that answering every cry, loosing yourself in child care, getting your kid involved in everything and using all your energy on your children is benefiting them, but it isn't. Not if your marriage is falling apart in the process! Children are the most secure and happy inside of the confines of a functioning and loving family which starts with a functioning and loving marriage.

Number Three: Your Children
Yup, children come in third on the right kind of priority list. Remember that children are a supplement to your life, not your life. When God established marriage and families, he had every intention for children to enhance the marriage and grow the family. He wanted us as couples to be able to raise healthy children to grow up and start families of their own. It is critical that we know and understand that role in our children's lives, we are players in their lives, not their lives. Raising our children to make right choices from diapers to college is a priority to be sure but not the ultimate priority and not at the expense of our marriages! This being said, Children come BEFORE work. Now I know that I will touch a nerve for many women, but this is the fact, children need present parents. I understand that work for many is necessary to survive and that it for many is something that keeps them healthy. I get it, but it should never be pursued at the expense of your children. Please hear me when I say children must come before work whether that means you should adjust your life so that one parent can stay at home, or figure out a way to keep it balanced. You have such short time with them before they are gone......don't miss it.

Number 4: Your work.
This is one of the priorities that has gotten WAY out of whack in our American culture. We are working more hours than ever, sacrificing our time for the sake of our paycheck, leaving earlier, coming home later, exhausting ourselves climbing the corporate ladder and missing important events in our lives for the sake of our work. For many, work is falling squarely in the number one spot on our list and our families and lives are suffering for it. Keep your work in the right perspective. Money and success are nice, but can be easily taken away. Your heart, your relationships and your family are much more longstanding. Put your time into what matters and keep work in the right place.

Number 5: Your friends.
Friends are so important to our overall life health, but they are not the endall! This is especially hard for women because we are so relational and lets face it, we like to gossip and "Vent." The problem is that we prioritize our "venting" time with friends over actually talking and resolving issues with our spouses. We prioritize our gossiping time over time spent pouring joy and contentment into our children. Sadly we even prioritize "girl time" over time spent pursuing the Lord the ultimate giver of life and friendships. Your relationships with your friends are an important part of your life and personal health but come after your have a strong relationship with the Lord, a good relationship with your spouse, healthy relationships with your kids and the right relationship with your work.

Your community and all other facets of life come after these top 5. You, yourself, fit into all of them. I know it seems overwhelming, but remember that nothing happens overnight, and it is one small step after another that makes the difference. Start today by pursuing a relationship with Christ. With Him, your priorities will slowly and consistently fall into the right places.